The Gillette Commercial and the Men it Made Angry

It's been really, really interesting watching the different reactions to the Gillette Commercial. I've watched it a few times and see nothing other than a commercial from a company that makes products for men advocating that we stop enabling and encouraging toxic male behavior. It's not saying men are toxic, it's not saying all masculinity is toxic, and it isn't saying men are the only ones who do bad things.Despite what appears to be a pretty common-sense message, men everywhere are getting angry and offended. Some of the angry comments I've heard and read are along the lines of, "I guess men are all terrible!" and "what about women who do xyz?" Again, these are responses to a message that, in my opinion, is not being sent. One of the commercial's scenes involves two boys fighting while a bunch of men at grills watch and justify it as "boys being boys." Yes, this portrays a stereotype. Unfortunately, however, it's a stereotype that many men try actively to live up to: being rough, aggressive, dominant, and raising your sons to do the same. The message here simply seems to be that this stereotype is ridiculous and is not something to shoot for. The commercial ends with men breaking this stereotype and engaging in respectful behavior. Again, not something that I think is terribly insulting to men.The men who are responding to this commercial with anger are very likely doing so because they identify with the stereotypes that are being discouraged in it. Gillette has brilliantly created a commercial that triggers the individuals with toxic masculinity to speak up and identify themselves, thus giving healthier men the opportunity to do what they do in the commercial, which is to call them out on it and encourage different behavior.  If you were angered by this commercial, I highly recommend you take a look at why. Is there a part of your that feels personally insulted by it? Did it demean values that you consider important? Did it bring up guilt for behaviors that you yourself have engaged in? If so, I encourage you to step out of the victim role and look at how you can better yourself as a result of this experience. Rather than being offended because you've catcalled women in the past (something the commercial depicts as unhealthy), try looking at your past behavior honestly and deciding if it's something you want to identify with or distance yourself from. You have the ability to change. If you engage in the behaviors depicted in the commercial, you aren't a toxic male, you are a male with some toxic behavior that can be changed by practicing new habits. Challenge yourself to grow rather than insisting others accept your harmful behavior.I do want to express that I'm not entirely without empathy for the men getting angry. It's not completely outlandish to think that it's poking fun at more traditional men. However, it's important to understand the difference between poking fun at a gender and poking fun at a gender stereotype that causes harm. Nowhere in the Gillette commercial does it say anything about men all being like this. In fact, it quite clearly shows several men shutting down this toxic behavior. If anything, I found this commercial to be quite empowering. We all have the ability to stand up to toxic masculine behavior and insist that men treat other people with respect. Nobody is saying to shed yourself of masculinity, but to simply redefine it. My hope for this world is that one day, "being a man" means standing up to toxic behavior rather than engaging in it.